A Note on why you should never apologize for wanting more

While I’m going through some changes in my life right now there so are many thoughts in my head. Thoughts, questions and fears that I believe many women and men in their twenties and thirties have. I’ve never thought I would come at a point in my current age of 26 where I would question absolutely everything. But while asking around I discovered it’s more common than I thought. That’s why I decided to write down my very own perspective in order to hopefully help and inspire others to also get active and change their life.

Living a meaningful happy life and being in touch with yourself and what person I am as a young woman are such important and fascinating topics. I also believe a lot in following your gut and when something feels wrong you should definitely change it. Never the less it’s not always as easy as it sounds and you catch yourself living with this restless gut wrenching feeling longer and longer and it grows bigger and bigger. A huge part of the problem is what society tells us or makes us believe is right and a good life. Security and steadyness is enough and more important than following your dreams, a big idea or your true purpose. Also we should be thankful for what we have, which is so much more than a lot of people in the world. Those points are so true, but also leave us with feeling lots of guilt for wanting more. Not only are we holding ourselves back, because we think we’re not worthy of experiencing true happiness. It’s also the perfect excuse for freezing up in circumstances we’re not feeling fulfilled or worse fully desperate in. Let me tell you, you should never apologize for wanting more.

But what is this “more“? It’s not necessary more of something (money/friends/moments), it can also be less of something (stress/people/noise). It’s about truly finding out what makes us happy and what makes a fulfilled life for you. It‘s important for me to clarify that this more doesn’t mean taking the next step in your career or reaching a big goal everyone is celebrating you for. Living an extraordinary life is not about achieving it’s about being, accepting and living your true self and about choosing your personal happiness and purpose. Wanting more is mostly happening at a turning point in your life. There’s a voice in your head saying this is not it. Your gut is already telling you for a long time that this doesn’t feel right. It’s quiet at first, but it gets louder and louder as time passes. Something needs to change. Maybe the picture of how this more looks like will get clearer or maybe you just know what you don’t want. It’s your turn now to find out how you can make those changes and get to a point of clarity, self love and inner satisfaction.

It’s easy to stay in our comfort zone and accepting life as is. But we have to overcome those apologetically feelings and step out of our small world where we’re restricting ourselves and our power. Even though there’s fear and people telling you not to do it, deep inside you know what’s right for you. And you’re the only person, who can accept and make this change in your head and in your life. You are allowed to have these feelings and you deserve to live the happiest life possible.

But what to do next after (finally) realizing and accepting that something needs to change. How do we know what our purpose is, where our true happiness lies and how our dream life looks like? How do we determine what is the right direction to go?

Again listen to your gut. I would describe the feeling of knowing where you want to be as a warm feeling and a picture in your head. It makes you feel good and puts a smile on your face. You can already see yourself at that point and it sends an unbelievably right and relieved feeling into your stomach. It makes you feel at home and at ease. Picture it. At what place are you? Who is with you? What are you doing? How is your everyday looking? How do you feel? Deep inside you know there is no other possibility than following this picture. No excuses anymore – it‘s worth overcoming that fear!

Scheme a plan on how you can reach this picture in your head. Small steps, but take action. Don’t just let it stay inspiration, a dream or a plan. Of course it’s a whole different story to really get there, which might contain a lot of work, but don‘t give up. It will take time, but one day you’ll live that picture.

If you only know there’s something wrong, but don’t know yet what is right for you, hang in there. Try to be brave and head into a different direction and change just something. There might be possibilites and options that you never thought of and they only open up, if you  test alternatives. Try plan B and C and you might end up exactly where you are supposed to. I know that all we want is to arrive at that point of inner satisfaction, home, belonging and peace. Admitting you haven’t and being in this transformational phase is hard. But it’s not a reason to not fight and give up. This phase too shall pass.

All of us get to write each and every chapter of our life. Listen to your intuition and define what story you want to live. What means success to you, what gives you inner peace and what sets your heart in flames (but in a good way)? We’ll get there! Just being happy and fulfilled in that moment. That’s what I wish everyone of you to experience.

I would love to know how this picture in your head looks like for you in the comments. If we’re talking about it, it becomes more real and we all need that little push. Sending all of you experiencing this process right now lots of strength and love. It will all be good!

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